"Are we who live in the more developed parts of the world to retreat into a cocoon of privilege while the storm rages elsewhere – for the unfortunate people in Burma or Sudan for instance? Can we excuse ourselves with talk of compassion fatigue because we now see far more than we can do anything about? … each and every one of us is responsible for making the most of our talents resources, exercising our callings, engaging fully in making a difference in our spheres of influence, and doing our utmost to help our neighbors in their need – including relieving their suffering and taking a stand against the evil that oppresses them... None of us can save the world, and to try to do so would be to flirt with despair. Our tiny circles of influence are limited, some less so than others, but for all of us that influence is significant. And when we each exercise our responsible significance and the significance of each of our callings overlaps with those of others, the ripples we make together can spread far and wide."
It is narratives like this that grab my heart and will not let me stay comfortable in suburbia living.
It is times when I see my son gather some of his toys and clothes, on his own, and put a bag together to take over to Africa (pj's, Lego's, a small calender - so the children know their birthday). It is times when I see my daughter give me her money, that she has been saving, so we can buy some blankets for children in Africa. It is times when I hear of girls 10 years old prostituting themselves up to 8, 9, or 10 times a day for a slice of bread. It is in these times that my heart is touched at the core and I ask the question: "How soon will we go?"
And when I begin to think, "Lets just stay here, invest more in our home, live safely..." I find those thoughts are short lived and my heart comes alive again when I think of the first trip Sophie and Cole will have visiting Africa or India.
It is going to be the trips to Zambia, not Siesta Key, that are going to really impact Sophie and Cole (and just as importantly, the children they visit) in ways that will shape them to be confident and compassionate individuals. And when we have confident and compassionate children who become adults, that is how we make a difference in our world - one child at a time - living in suburbia or not.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
January 20th, 2009
God Bless America Today! Today is a symbol of freedom fought years ago lead by brave and courageous souls. And a symbol of persistence, as we continue to fight for freedom many souls have yet to taste.
Freedom represents many different things: Freedom of speech, freedom of religion to freedom from emotional bondage and abuse. Any type of freedom we celebrate today is a treasure and comes at a cost. It is our responsibility to step up to the plate and make sure every soul is able to experience the journey of freedom in his/her walk.
I'm proud of America today. I'm proud for one day, we can put a side our core beliefs and use the energy that so often separates us from each other, to see how all of our souls long for the same taste: freedom.
May the thirst for freedom, through the spirit of Jesus Christ, and courage burn inside our hearts long after January 20, 2009.
Sweet blessings from my heart to yours.
Freedom represents many different things: Freedom of speech, freedom of religion to freedom from emotional bondage and abuse. Any type of freedom we celebrate today is a treasure and comes at a cost. It is our responsibility to step up to the plate and make sure every soul is able to experience the journey of freedom in his/her walk.
I'm proud of America today. I'm proud for one day, we can put a side our core beliefs and use the energy that so often separates us from each other, to see how all of our souls long for the same taste: freedom.
May the thirst for freedom, through the spirit of Jesus Christ, and courage burn inside our hearts long after January 20, 2009.
Sweet blessings from my heart to yours.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Lis & Amb
This past week I have been sentimental with thoughts of my sisters - who they are as individuals, how beautiful they are, the life they have created for themselves, and the kindness they show me. My youngest sister is having twin girls soon- which will give her 3 girls - and I can't help but think of my two sisters and I growing up together like my 3 darling nieces will be.
I adore my sisters, and I can say at times I wouldn't have always said that. There are very few people in life who have created the depth of joy and the depth of hurt my sisters have created for me. When I think of the many adventures we have been on together, and have put each other through, it is an act of grace on each of our parts our love is able to conquor all. I know the author of that grace, that each of us give to each other daily is our Creator. A Creator that knew before time we would be the perfect sisters for each other.
Its funny, most families have a sibling who is a "Lion" or "Beaver" etc. However, like my mom has always stated, my parents raised 3 first born's - we all like to be in charge! I am amazed of how we get a long besides we would all rather stay up late than get up at the crack of dawn!
On the other hand... One red head, one brunette and one blond. They enjoy a smaller town, I love urban life (in spite of my place at Reynolds Plantation). They love to ride horses - I'd rather let a horse take me on a carriage ride - One would rather vacation in the mountains, I'd take a beach any day - One would rather embrace the gray hairs that come with wisdom and I've yet to surrender to mine - Both have been brave enough to camp and even admit they love camping, I've yet to try it (the idea of camping makes me nausous) - One would rather creatively put a new dessert together for friends and I'd rather support the local bakery - One was born enjoying the art of 'simplicity' and the idea of 'constant change' seems 'simple' to me - One would rather embrace an "organized chaos" house with 5 precious children and my one daughter and one boy are perfect for me. The list goes on...We are the definition sisters: sometimes we are so opposite that people wonder how we are family and the next moment we are finishing each other's sentences.
Lis & Amb have taught me more about life than almost anyone else. They taught me the joy of true friendship, unconditional love, the power of honesty, the art of 'disciplined living' and the art of 'bumming'. They taught me the gift of fighting for someone you love, the significance of celebrating milestones, and perhaps the most important, they taught me the freedom of forgiveness.
Thank you, Alisa & Amber for sticking with me, particularly when I know loving me back as a sister has been more than trying at times over the years. Perhaps the sweetest gift of sisters is I know there are always friends a phone call a way, no matter what. Both of them have given me books on "sisterhood" over the years. One of my favorite sayings is from a book "Sisters". "If I ever seem to take you for granted: Forgive me."
I love you forever and feel like the most blessed sister - right in between you two.
I adore my sisters, and I can say at times I wouldn't have always said that. There are very few people in life who have created the depth of joy and the depth of hurt my sisters have created for me. When I think of the many adventures we have been on together, and have put each other through, it is an act of grace on each of our parts our love is able to conquor all. I know the author of that grace, that each of us give to each other daily is our Creator. A Creator that knew before time we would be the perfect sisters for each other.
Its funny, most families have a sibling who is a "Lion" or "Beaver" etc. However, like my mom has always stated, my parents raised 3 first born's - we all like to be in charge! I am amazed of how we get a long besides we would all rather stay up late than get up at the crack of dawn!
On the other hand... One red head, one brunette and one blond. They enjoy a smaller town, I love urban life (in spite of my place at Reynolds Plantation). They love to ride horses - I'd rather let a horse take me on a carriage ride - One would rather vacation in the mountains, I'd take a beach any day - One would rather embrace the gray hairs that come with wisdom and I've yet to surrender to mine - Both have been brave enough to camp and even admit they love camping, I've yet to try it (the idea of camping makes me nausous) - One would rather creatively put a new dessert together for friends and I'd rather support the local bakery - One was born enjoying the art of 'simplicity' and the idea of 'constant change' seems 'simple' to me - One would rather embrace an "organized chaos" house with 5 precious children and my one daughter and one boy are perfect for me. The list goes on...We are the definition sisters: sometimes we are so opposite that people wonder how we are family and the next moment we are finishing each other's sentences.
Lis & Amb have taught me more about life than almost anyone else. They taught me the joy of true friendship, unconditional love, the power of honesty, the art of 'disciplined living' and the art of 'bumming'. They taught me the gift of fighting for someone you love, the significance of celebrating milestones, and perhaps the most important, they taught me the freedom of forgiveness.
Thank you, Alisa & Amber for sticking with me, particularly when I know loving me back as a sister has been more than trying at times over the years. Perhaps the sweetest gift of sisters is I know there are always friends a phone call a way, no matter what. Both of them have given me books on "sisterhood" over the years. One of my favorite sayings is from a book "Sisters". "If I ever seem to take you for granted: Forgive me."
I love you forever and feel like the most blessed sister - right in between you two.
Seek Good
January focus: Seek Good
This verse enables me to recognize the value in "seeking good" in everything I do and everywhere I go - I hope it can do the same for you. Words are powerful for me, as they are often my saving grace in keeping an intentional living perspective.
Amos 5:14-15 (English Standard Version Bible)
Seek good, and not evil, that you may live;and so the LORD,
the God of hosts, will be with you, as you have said.
Hate evil, and love good, and establish justice in the gate;
it may be that the LORD, the God of hosts,
will be gracious to the remnant of Joseph.
Sweet blessings from my heart to yours.
This verse enables me to recognize the value in "seeking good" in everything I do and everywhere I go - I hope it can do the same for you. Words are powerful for me, as they are often my saving grace in keeping an intentional living perspective.
Amos 5:14-15 (English Standard Version Bible)
Seek good, and not evil, that you may live;and so the LORD,
the God of hosts, will be with you, as you have said.
Hate evil, and love good, and establish justice in the gate;
it may be that the LORD, the God of hosts,
will be gracious to the remnant of Joseph.
Sweet blessings from my heart to yours.
Friday, January 2, 2009
Judge Not
Matthew 7 (English Standard Version Bible)
"Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
...Praying our souls see the power in never judging but showing compassion in our journeys, as we embrace a new year.
"Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
...Praying our souls see the power in never judging but showing compassion in our journeys, as we embrace a new year.
Yahweh's Freedom
Happy New Year from my heart to yours! I love this time of year. It is a time to reflect on my past year and yet look forward to a year God only knows about. I have so many emotions as I sit down, I'm not sure what to write next...
I am amazed the chains God has lifted off of me in the past year. One thing my past abuse likes to do to me is drag me to past emotions, even if I have worked through them. Emotions of bitterness, resentment and isolation. And yet now when those ugly emotions come back at me, they no longer have a place to rest, like they use to. Instead of having a home inside of my soul, they are strangers to me.
This past month my daughter has repeatedly told me, "Mom, you are so peaceful. I feel restful and happy..." Sophie no doubt got the brunt of my emotions over the past years, as I started to work through for the first time in January 2006. I was emotionally drained, negative, tired - in spite of appearing 'everything was OK'. When Sophie told me how peaceful she sees me today, my heart was struck of how much my emotions do effect my children and husband. Ouch.
As much as it pains me, I know my daughter is being raised to understand the power of releasing pain and suppressed silenced emotions - because she has seen the darkness of them but more importantly has seen the power in letting them go, through tears and all. She has seen oppression but she has seen greater victory. She understands the cost it takes to understand freedom in life. I am thankful Sophie recognizes different emotions and how there is no such thing as "they will just go away if I don't think about it or them..." Because if the emotions are not directly faced with, they end up controlling you and making you into a person you can't stand.
I know.
I was becoming an anxious, controlling, impatient adult - and taking it out on people around me I thought I could control - instead of backing off and addressing my core emotions that were driving me to be controlling with this or that. Looking back when I was blind to my abuse but aware of my need to control - that is when I started to obsessively shop and decorate. It was a way to control something and give me a false sense I was in control. It was not until last year, that the chain of comfort (look at old post on hidden distractions) was sliced in my life. I still battle the 'need' for comfort but feel beyond free to recognize the 'need' for it does nothing for me at the end of the day - but actually just leaves me more empty than before.
I love the line in the song YAHWEH by u2: "...Always pain before the child is born" That line could not be any truer in my journey.
I'm 31 and my soul was born for the first time this past year...I have had significant points in my journey of freedom... 10 years old, 19 years old, 28 years old....but never to the degree my soul has experienced this past 4 months. Sometimes I feel so free I get scared because I feel to vulnerable. And the vulnerable space I have in my heart now is fulfilling to let the love of my God fill me and the love for others that will never have an opportunity to break their silence. I know my voice was broken for one purpose - to share the power of "Yahweh's Freedom" with others...whether that is only with my precious husband and 2 darling children or a stranger I may only talk to one time.
I am 'ready' for 2009 - Not because I am on this mission to control 'it' ( but not absence of having a plan on what I would like to do it) but because I know I will have times of victory, of failure, of joy, of sadness...and my life is in the hands of my Creator that will not be surprised by anything that happens in my life.
I am amazed the chains God has lifted off of me in the past year. One thing my past abuse likes to do to me is drag me to past emotions, even if I have worked through them. Emotions of bitterness, resentment and isolation. And yet now when those ugly emotions come back at me, they no longer have a place to rest, like they use to. Instead of having a home inside of my soul, they are strangers to me.
This past month my daughter has repeatedly told me, "Mom, you are so peaceful. I feel restful and happy..." Sophie no doubt got the brunt of my emotions over the past years, as I started to work through for the first time in January 2006. I was emotionally drained, negative, tired - in spite of appearing 'everything was OK'. When Sophie told me how peaceful she sees me today, my heart was struck of how much my emotions do effect my children and husband. Ouch.
As much as it pains me, I know my daughter is being raised to understand the power of releasing pain and suppressed silenced emotions - because she has seen the darkness of them but more importantly has seen the power in letting them go, through tears and all. She has seen oppression but she has seen greater victory. She understands the cost it takes to understand freedom in life. I am thankful Sophie recognizes different emotions and how there is no such thing as "they will just go away if I don't think about it or them..." Because if the emotions are not directly faced with, they end up controlling you and making you into a person you can't stand.
I know.
I was becoming an anxious, controlling, impatient adult - and taking it out on people around me I thought I could control - instead of backing off and addressing my core emotions that were driving me to be controlling with this or that. Looking back when I was blind to my abuse but aware of my need to control - that is when I started to obsessively shop and decorate. It was a way to control something and give me a false sense I was in control. It was not until last year, that the chain of comfort (look at old post on hidden distractions) was sliced in my life. I still battle the 'need' for comfort but feel beyond free to recognize the 'need' for it does nothing for me at the end of the day - but actually just leaves me more empty than before.
I love the line in the song YAHWEH by u2: "...Always pain before the child is born" That line could not be any truer in my journey.
I'm 31 and my soul was born for the first time this past year...I have had significant points in my journey of freedom... 10 years old, 19 years old, 28 years old....but never to the degree my soul has experienced this past 4 months. Sometimes I feel so free I get scared because I feel to vulnerable. And the vulnerable space I have in my heart now is fulfilling to let the love of my God fill me and the love for others that will never have an opportunity to break their silence. I know my voice was broken for one purpose - to share the power of "Yahweh's Freedom" with others...whether that is only with my precious husband and 2 darling children or a stranger I may only talk to one time.
I am 'ready' for 2009 - Not because I am on this mission to control 'it' ( but not absence of having a plan on what I would like to do it) but because I know I will have times of victory, of failure, of joy, of sadness...and my life is in the hands of my Creator that will not be surprised by anything that happens in my life.
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